Getting married is like trading in the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one.

Sometimes it seems to me I've known so many men that the FBI ought to come to me first to compare fingerprints.

I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do up the zipper on the back of your dress?

[On the metaphysical:] ... I knew in some marvelous way I had touched the hem of the unknown. And being me, I wanted to lift that hemline a little bit more.

I don't like myself, I'm crazy about myself.

Brains are an asset, if you hide them.

When you get the personality, you don't need the nudity.