I believe that one day the world will judge the witch hunt against homosexuals just as harshly as it judges the Spanish Inquisition and the Holocaust.

Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you

Let's get out of these wet clothes and into a dry Martini.

Reason was nowhere, time was an immovable object nailed high on the wall, except where the world kept shop.

Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.

Getting married is like trading in the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one.

Ya know it was a toss-up whether I go in for diamonds or sing in the choir. The choir lost.