gossip, after it reaches a certain point of insult and falsehood, becomes a source of amusement to its victims.

When two duties jostle each other, one of 'em isn't a duty.

... if a man really and truly believed that black was white, you might advise him to see an oculist, but you mustn't call him a liar.

the profession of the ministry is like matrimony: if it is possible for you to keep out of it, it's a sign that you've no business to go into it!

A sneer is like a flame; it may occasionally be curative because it cauterizes, but it leaves a bitter scar.

I notice that when people have no sense of responsibility, you call them either criminals or geniuses.

... Love never forgets; or if it does, it is an imperfect love, like the beautiful love of a dog, faithful and unreasoning.