If there are no cigars in heaven, I shall not go.

Warm summer sun, shine kindly here. Warm southern wind, blow softly here. Green sod above, lie light, lie light. Good night, dear Heart, Good night, good night.

Carlyle said 'a lie cannot live.' It shows that he did not know how to tell them.

The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.

English humor is hard to appreciate, though, unless you are trained to it. The English papers, in reporting my speeches, always put 'laughter' in the wrong place.

I have always been rather better treated in San Francisco than I actually deserved.

I am an anti-imperialist. I am opposed to having the eagle put its talons on any other land.