Not until you become a stranger to yourself will you be able to make acquaintance with the Friend.

No man has an appreciation so various that his judgment is good upon all varieties of literary work.

I would rather go to bed with Lillian Russell stark naked than Ulysses S Grant in full military regalia.

The cayote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him, and even the fleas would desert him for a velocipede.

When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people.

I pledged myself to smoke but one cigar a day. I kept the cigar waiting until bedtime, then I had a luxurious time with it. But desire persecuted me every day and all day long. I found myself hunting for larger cigars...within the month my cigar had grown to such proportions I could have used it as a crutch.

I heard a Californian student in Heidelberg say, in one of his calmest moods, that he would rather decline two drinks than one German adjective.