The humorist who invented trial by jury played a colossal practical joke upon the world, but since we have the system we ought to try and respect it. A thing which is not thoroughly easy to do, when we reflect that by command of the law a criminal juror must be an intellectual vacuum, attached to a melting heart and perfectly macaronian bowels of compassion.

Good fathers not only tell us how to live, they show us.

The best of us would rather be popular than right.

If you've got a nice fresh corpse, fetch him out!

Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.

Nothing spoils a good story like the arrival of an eyewitness.

Newport, Rhode Island, that breeding place-that stud farm, so to speak-of aristocracy; aristocracy of the American type.