Taking the pledge will not make bad liquor good, but it will improve it.

The Creator made Italy from designs by Michelangelo.

In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.

The [Kodak is] the only witness I have encountered in my long experience that I couldn't bribe.

Man has imagined a heaven, and has left entirely out of it the supremest of all his delights...sexual intercourse!...His heaven is like himself: strange, interesting, astonishing, grotesque. I give you my word, it has not a single feature in it that he actually values.

An occultation of Venus is not half so difficult as an eclipse of the sun, but because it comes seldom the world thinks it's a grand thing.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman - And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.