The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes.

Hero: Person in a book who does things which he can't and girl marries him for it.

A man who keeps company with glaciers comes to feel tolerably insignificiant by and by. The Alps and the glaciers together are able to take every bit of conceit out of a man and reduce his self-importance to zero if he will only remain within the influence of their sublime presence long enough to give it a fair and reasonable chance to do its work.

The citizen who sees his society's democratic clothes being worn out and does not cry it out, is not a patriot, but a traitor.

The old Irish when immersing a babe at baptism left out the right arm so that it would remain pagan for good fighting

Epitaphs are cheap, and they do a poor chap a world of good after he is dead, especially if he had hard luck while he was alive. I wish they were used more.

I was educated once - it took me years to get over it.