I said there was but one solitary thing about the past worth remembering, and that was the fact that it is past-can't be restored.

My axiom is, to succeed in business: avoid my example.

It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help.

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.

Evolution is a blind giant who rolls a snowball down a hill. The ball is made of flakes-circumstances. They contribute to the mass without knowing it. They adhere without intention, and without foreseeing what is to result. When they see the result they marvel at the monster ball and wonder how the contriving of it came to be originally thought out and planned. Whereas there was no such planning, there was only a law: the ball once started, all the circumstances that happened to lie in its path would help to build it, in spite of themselves.

A tax is a fine for doing well, a fine is a tax for doing wrong.

Next you'd see a raft sliding by, away off yonder, and maybe a galoot on it chopping. . . you'd see the ax flash and come down-you don't hear nothing; you see the ax go up again, and by the time it's above the man's head then you hear the k'chunk!-it had took all that time to come over the water.