Wine is a clog to the pen, not an inspiration.

In early times some sufferer had to sit up with a toothache, and he put in the time inventing the German language.

If true, rarely beautiful. If beautiful, rarely true.

A man's house burns down. The smoking wreckage represents only a ruined home that was dear through years of use and pleasant associations. By and by, as the days and weeks go on, first he misses this, then that, then the other thing. And when he casts about for it he finds that it was in that house. Always it is an essential - here was but one of its kind. It cannot be replaced. It was in that house. It is irrevocably lost...It will be years before the tale of lost essentials is complete, and not till then can he truly know the magnitude of his disaster.

If you've got a nice fresh corpse, fetch him out!

There is no salvation for us but to adopt Civilization and lift ourselves down to its level.

Laughter is the greatest weapon we have and we, as humans, use it the least.