The exquisitely bad is as satisfying to the soul as the exquisitely good. Only the mediocre is unendurable.

When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.

The history of our race, and each individual’s experience, are sown thick with evidence that a truth is not hard to kill and that a lie told well is immortal.

The idea that a baby doesn't amount to anything! Why, one baby is just a house and a front yard full by itself. One baby can, furnish more business than you and your whole Interior Department can attend to. He is enterprising, irrepressible, brimful of lawless activities.

I try never to let my schooling get in the way of my education.

Custom is, to think a handsome thing in private but tame it down in the utterance.

[The Bible is] a mass of fables and traditions, mere mythology.