The more I know people, the more I love my dog.

I have never seen what to me seemed an atom of proof that there is a future life. And yet-I am inclined to expect one.

It liberates the vandal to travel-you never saw a bigoted, opinionated, stubborn, narrow-minded, self-conceited, almighty mean man in your life but he had stuck in one place since he was born and thought God made the world and dyspepsia and bile for his especial comfort and satisfaction.

There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.

I make it a rule never to smoke while I'm sleeping.

He has been a doctor a year now and has had two patients - no, three, I think - yes, it was three; I attended their funerals.

You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopaths (orthodoxy) to destroy it.