He was endowed with a stupidity which by the least little stretch would go around the globe four times and tie.

The banging and slamming and booming and crashing were something beyond belief. [On Lohengrin]

I'm merely running some errands. This is now off the record.

Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed down-stairs one step at a time.

Never let the truth get in the way of a good story.

But we are all insane, anyway ... The suicides seem to be the only sane people.

All generalizations are false, including this one.