If God is what people say there can be no one in the universe so unhappy as He; for He sees unceasingly myriads of His creatures suffering unspeakable miseries--and besides this foresees how they are going to suffer during the remainder of their lives. One might as well say, "As unhappy as God."

In religion and politics, people's belief's and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second hand, and without examination

When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Kentucky, because everything there happens 20 years after it happens anywhere else.

When in doubt tell the truth.

I have spent most of my life worrying about things that have never happened.

Yes - en I's rich now, come to look at it. I owns myself, en I's wuth eight hund'd dollars. I wisht I had de money, I wouldn' want no mo'.

Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection.