How often we recall with regret that Napoleon once shot at a magazine editor and missed him and killed a publisher. But we remember with charity that his intentions were good.

If ignorance is bliss, why isn't the world happier?

There are two reasons why anybody buys anything. The real reason, and the reason they give you.

You need not expect to get your book right the first time. Go to work and revamp or rewrite it. God only exhibits his thunder and lightning at intervals, and so they always command attention. These are God's adjectives. You thunder and lightning too much; the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.

...fry me an optimist for breakfast.

God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.

The true charm of pedestrians does not lie in the walking, or in the scenery, but in the talking.