Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

Satan (impatiently) to Newcomer: The trouble with you Chicago people is, that you think you are the best people down here; whereas you are merely the most numerous.

I asked Tom if countries always apologized when they had done wrong, and he says - "Yes; the little ones does".

There are things which some people never attempt during their whole lives, but one of these is not poetry. Poetry attacks all human beings sooner or later, and, like the measles, is mild or violent according to the age of the sufferer.

Truth is neither alive nor dead; it just aggravates itself all the time.

It is human to exaggerate the merits of the dead.

The man who sets out to carry a cat by its tail learns something that will always be useful and which never will grow dim or doubtful.