If smoking cigars is not permitted in heaven, I won''t go.

How little a thing can make us happy when we feel that we have earned it.

What a man misses mostly in heaven is company.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Everybody lies...every day, every hour, awake, asleep, in his dreams, in his joy, in his mourning. If he keeps his tongue still his hands, his feet, his eyes, his attitude will convey deception.

I was in one of the most grand attitudes I ever struck, with my arm stretched up pointing to the sun. It was a noble effect. You could see the shudder sweep the mass like a wave.

Tight pants are just uncomfortable.