Each nation knowing it has the only true religion and the only sane system of government, each despising all the others, each an ass and not suspecting it.

Congressman is the trivialist distinction for a full grown man.

The most permanent lessons in morals are those which come, not of book teaching, but of experience.

I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.

The timid man yearns for full value and demands a tenth. The bold man strikes for double value and compromises on par.

Children and fools always speak the truth

When I take up one of Jane Austen's books ... I feel like a barkeep entering the kingdom of heaven. I know what his sensation would be and his private comments. He would not find the place to his taste, and he would probably say so.