I don't want no better book than what your face is.

God puts something good and loveable in every man His hands create.

The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad.

The exercise of an extraordinary gift is the supremest pleasure in life.

If it's your job to eat a frog, it's best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it's your job to eat two frogs, it's best to eat the biggest one first.

Our lives, our liberty, and our property are never in greater danger than when Congress is in session.

The writing begins when you’ve finished. Only then do you know what you’re trying to say.