I don't know anything about this man. Anyhow, I only know two things about him. One is, he has never been in jail, and the other is, I don't know why.

When you feel like tellin a feller to go to the devil - tell him to go to Chicago - it'll anser every purpose, and is perhaps, a leetle more expensive.

Don't wait the time is never just right.

Every man is a moon and has a side which he turns toward nobody: you have to slip around behind it if you want to see it.

I have traveled more than anyone else, and I have noticed that even the angels speak English with an accent.

The Creator made Italy from designs by Michelangelo.

The lightning there is peculiar; it is so convincing, that when it strikes a thing it doesn't leave enough of that thing behind for you to tell whether-Well, you'd think it was something valuable, and a Congressman had been there.