It was the most earnest ambition I ever had....Not that I ever really wanted to be a preacher, but because it never occurred to me that a preacher could be damned. It looked like a safe job.

Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths

I am not interested to know whether vivisection produces results that are profitable to the human race or doesn't...The pain which it inflicts upon unconsenting animals is the basis of my enmity toward it, and it is to me sufficient justification of the enmity without looking further.

There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded.

Grown people everywhere are always likely to cling to the religion they were brought up in.

While the rest of the species is descended from apes, redheads are descended from cats.

A person that started in to carry a cat home by the tail was gitting knowledge that was always going to be useful to him, and warn't ever going to grow dim or doubtful.