George Washington, as a boy, was ignorant of the commonest accomplishments of youth. He could not even lie.

I don't know of a single foreign product that enters this country untaxed, except the answer to prayer.

The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.

Golden rule: Made of hard metal so it could stand severe wear, it not being known at that time that butter would answer.

There are people who think that honesty is always the best policy. This is a superstition. There are times when the appearance of it is worth six of it.

I have learned that there lies dormant in the souls of all men a penchant for some particular musical instrument an an unsuspected yearning to play on it, which are bound to wake up an demand attention someday. Therefore you who rail at such that disturb your slumbers with unsuccessful and demoralizing attempts to subjugate a guitar, beware! For sooner or later your own time will come.

Hardly a man in the world has an opinion upon morals, political, or religion which he got otherwise than through his associations and sympathies.