You have heretofore found out, by my teachings, that man is a fool; you are now aware that woman is a damned fool.
Mark TwainThanksgiving Day - Let all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks, now, but the turkeys. In the island of Fiji they do not use turkeys, they use plumbers. It does not become you and me to sneer at Fiji.
Mark TwainWell, my book is written-let it go. But if it were only to write over again there wouldn't be so many things left out. They burn in me; and they keep multiplying; but now they can't ever be said. And besides, they would require a library-and a pen warmed up in hell.
Mark TwainWhat, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce.
Mark Twain