If I were going to construct a God I would furnish him with some ways and qualities and characteristics which the Present One lacks... He would spend some of His eternities in trying to forgive Himself for making man unhappy when He could have made him happy with the same effort and He would spend the rest of them in studying astronomy.
Mark TwainThe right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.
Mark TwainThe gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad.
Mark Twain