A woman springs a sudden reproach upon you which provokes a hot retort, and then she will presently ask you to apologize.

Humor must be one of the chief attributes of God. Plants and animals that are distinctly humorous in form and characteristics are God's jokes.

To be, or not to be; that is the bare bodkin That makes calamity of so long life.

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.

Prophesy is a good line of business, but it is full of risks.

July 4. Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day than in all the other days of the year put together. This proves, by the number left in stock, that one fourth of July per year is now inadequate, the country has grown so

I purpose publishing these Letters here in the world before I return to you. Two editions. One, unedited, for Bible readers and their children; the other, expurgated, for persons of refinement