The Clintons want to do big worthy things, but they also want to squeeze money from rich people wherever they live on planet Earth, insatiably gobbling up cash for politics and charity and themselves from the same incestuous swirl.

The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.

Good and evil are not like the Redskins and the Cowboys.

It takes a lot of adrenaline and fear to make me actually write.

The Mormons even baptized Anne Frank. It took Ernest Michel, then chairman of the American Gathering of Jewish Holocaust Survivors, three years to get Mormons to agree to stop proxy-baptizing Holocaust victims.

If wit is the most sophisticated form of humor, pranks are the most juvenile.

Personally, I've decided to stop evolving.