If you're alive, make a lot of noise, because life is the very opposite of death.

With the birth of the artist came the inevitable afterbirth... the critic

The only thing we don't have a god for is premature ejaculation... but I hear that it's coming quickly.

Some critics are emotionally desiccated, personally about as attractive as a year-old peach in a single girl's refrigerator.

There's not enough bad taste! I LOVE bad taste! I live for bad taste! I am the spokesman for bad taste!

I had low blood sugar, a chemical imbalance, plus the normal nervous breakdown everyone goes through from adolescence to adulthood.

The brilliance of Max Brooks is that he always quotes authorities at the back of his books that never existed. Like a Russian professor he made up that validates a story or character.