I'm always stunned when I find out people like Roosevelt and Tolstoy weren't Jewish. How could I love them so much?

Look, I had to take chances or it wasn't fun being funny.

I realised that all one really had to do was just observe. Observe and slightly exaggerate, and you had comedy. Instead of creating a mythical premise for a stupid joke, I found playing off truth got the best result.

There's not enough bad taste! I LOVE bad taste! I live for bad taste! I am the spokesman for bad taste!

American sex is generally straight. It happens at 11 o'clock Saturday night. In the rural areas, it happens at nine and it happens pretty fast. Got to get up the next morning, especially if there're kids. Can't make noise, either, wake the kids.

In every spoof I make real love to the things I am spoofing.

I have been lucky that some critics joined the mob in loving something I've done, or in appreciating it. I've been lucky. But most of the critics don't like what the people like. I think they have a very strange job, and they are meant to criticize.