I'd stand in line for Confession with old people and little kids, and as the line moved up and it was getting closer to my turn, I knew that when I got into the box I would lie! Again!

Alcohol is a very patient drug. It will wait for the alcoholic to pick it up one more time.

I lose all control after two drinks of anything

I believe in joy, but I believe in the flip-side, agony.

At awards time, The Exorcist was nominated in 11 categories, everybody but the janitor was up for an Oscar. There was no category for what I did.

I can only know what love is insofar as I can feel it.

With two leftover husbands to account for, my wicked soul has just about shriveled and died