I imagine there's a level of narcissism that goes into thinking you're enough.

It doesn't matter what you're chasing, when you get there you're gonna be like, "Oh, is this all? It kind of sucks."

The characters that I have on Twitter have very little resemblance to me, the person who's writing them.

I don't think I was awake for much of my childhood. I did a lot of napping. This might have been a defensive measure against encroaching depression. Until about the age of eleven or twelve, I had zero interests other than trying to steal gumballs from supermarket gumball machines.

The thing about narcissistic people is that they don't think they're being narcissistic.

Whatever expectations I had for myself, none of them have come to pass. I grew up thinking I was going to be an actor, which I am. But I thought I'd be a very serious sort of Shakespearean guy going from town to town having sex with various Juliets all over the country.

I think in doing stand-up there are no rules and there's no architecture.