There's really not a difference between an octopus and, like, a giant pile of snot.

We are lending money we don't have to kids who can't pay it back to train them for jobs that no longer exist. That's nuts.

Innovation without imitation is a complete waste of time.

Short-cuts lead to long delays.

Im a B-list celebrity trying to give it an honest look. They see me do actual work. ... I try to be the viewer with a microphone.

Happiness comes from knowing what you truly value, and behaving in a way that's consistent with those beliefs.

The thing that makes 'Dirty Jobs' different is that it's one of the few shows that portrays work in a way that doesn't highlight the drudgery. Instead, it highlights the humor.