Good jobs look a lot like kids playing and adults working.

Always flat front. You've got to be deeply suspicious of a man who consciously goes with pleats. Why would you do that?

The thing that makes 'Dirty Jobs' different is that it's one of the few shows that portrays work in a way that doesn't highlight the drudgery. Instead, it highlights the humor.

It’s about, when did it make sense to say one size fits everybody? It never ever ever made sense to do that, and yet we’re still selling education the same way we sold it when you and I were in high school.

Short-cuts lead to long delays.

Nobody makes a turd like that and lives.

Im a B-list celebrity trying to give it an honest look. They see me do actual work. ... I try to be the viewer with a microphone.