What you need is sustained outrage...there's far too much unthinking respect given to authority.

Although a life-long fashion dropout, I have absorbed enough by reading Harper's Bazaar while waiting at the dentist's to have grasped that the purpose of fashion is to make A Statement. My own modest Statement, discerned by true cognoscenti, is, "Woman Who Wears Clothes So She Won't Be Naked.

Whenever you hear a politician carry on about what a mess the schools are, be aware that you are looking at the culprit.

And the funny thing is, I've always been an optimist - it's practically a congenital disorder with me.

I learned two things growing up in Texas. 1: God loves you, and you're going to burn in hell forever. 2: Sex is the dirtiest and most dangerous thing you can possibly do, so save it for someone you love.

Nice is a pallid virtue. Not like honesty or courage or perseverance. On the other hand, in a nation notably lacking in civility, there is much to be said for nice.

If his IQ slips any lower, we'll have to water him twice a day