There was clearly nothing to do but flop down on the shabby little couch and howl.

There is one day that is ours. There is one day when all we Americans who are not self-made go back to the old home to eat saleratus biscuits and marvel how much nearer to the porch the old pump looks than it used to. Thanksgiving Day is the one day that is purely American.

The magi, as you know, were wise men wonderfully wise men who brought gifts to the Babe in the manger. They invented the art of giving Christmas presents.

There was clearly nothing to do but flop down on the shabby little couch and howl.

Life is made up of sobs, sniffles, and smiles, with sniffles predominating.

Perhaps there is no happiness in life so perfect as the martyr's.

Be always decent and right in your home town; and when you're on the road, never take more than four glasses of beer a day or play higher than a twenty-five-cent limit.