[A]ll of life, as we know it, moves in little, unavailing circles. More justly than to anything else, it can be likened to the game of baseball. Crack! we hit the ball, and away we go. If we earn a run (in life we call it success) we get back to the home plate and sit upon a bench. If we are thrown out, we walk back to the home plate -- and sit upon a bench.

When a man begins to be hilarious in a sorrowful way you can bet a million that he is dyeing his hair.

We can't buy one minute of time with cash; if we could, rich people would live longer.

Of habit, the power that keeps the earth from flying to pieces; though there is some silly theory of gravitation.

East is East, and West is San Francisco

Hospitality in the prairie country is not limited. Even if your enemy passes your way, you must feed him before you shoot him.

History is bright and fiction dull with homely men who have charmed women.