The only reason for doing a play is to make a statement about it, and by that I don't mean a conceit of the producer.

When you are down and out something always turns up - and it is usually the noses of your friends.

There are three intolerable things in life - cold coffee, lukewarm champagne, and overexcited women.

I don't think any word can explain a man's life.

My definition of success is not having things thrown at me!

Look at the real prodigies, and I look like nothing compared to them.

A toast, Jedediah, to love on my terms. Those are the only terms anybody ever knows - his own.