There is no such thing as a heterosexual male, only men who haven't met Oscar Wilde yet.

You have filled my tea with lumps of sugar, and though I asked most distinctly for bread and butter, you have given me cake. I am known for the gentleness of my disposition, and the extraordinary sweetness of my nature, but I warn you, Miss Cardew, you may go too far.

How does one cure the soul? Through the senses

I adore political parties. They are the only place left to us where people don't talk politics.

There is no good talking to him," said a Dragon-fly, who was sitting on the top of a large brown bulrush; "no good at all, for he has gone away." "Well, that is his loss, not mine," answered the Rocket. "I am not going to stop talking to him merely because he pays no attention. I like hearing myself talk. It is one of my greatest pleasures. I often have long conversations all by myself, and I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying." "Then you should definitely lecture on Philosophy," said the Dragon-fly.

Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason.

Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.