Cheap editions of great books may be delightful, but cheap editions of great men are absolutely detestable

I forget what killed it. I think it was her proposing to sacrifice the whole world for me. That is always a dreadful moment. It fills one with the terror of eternity.

Oh, how I vainly wished to the bearded man in the sky that I was Neapolitan. Why? So I could bring in a fine Neapolitan pest control to help with Queensberry's problem before it gets out of hand.

America is not a country, it is a world.

An actor is part illusionist, part artist, part ham.

The only thing that sustains one through life is the consciousness of the immense inferiority of everybody else, and this is a feeling that I have always cultivated.

It is through art, and through art only, that we can realise our perfection.