Mind you, it’s all bullshit with wine, isn’t it? It’s just f**king vinegar with a fizz, no matter what the tasters say.

I'm not a musician - I'm a ham.

I know that I'm here - I believe that I'm here for a purpose. I believe in forces of fate.

When I heard the Beatles, I thought thats it. That's what I want to be. I want to be a Beatle.

Killing a pig for a good old fry-up is one thing. But there's no excuse for being cruel, even if you're a bored teenage kid.

I'm the demon alcohol, demon alcohol, demon alcohol, demon alcohol. Let's party.

I remember one night in Memphis, I'd come out of a blackout, and I didn't know where I was. I'm feeling through the darkness - I was asleep in the middle of a freeway. I went up to this car in the darkness, and it was a cop car.