But everything is relative, Bertie... You, for instance, are my relative, and I am your relative.

I expect I shall feel better after tea.

Has anybody ever seen a dramatic critic in the daytime? Of course not. They come out after dark, up to no good.

You're one of those guys who can make a party just by leaving it. It's a great gift.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

I just sit at a typewriter and curse a bit.

Oh, I don't know, you know, don't you know?