The Middle Eastern states aren't nations; they're quarrels with borders.

If the Japanese want to be taken seriously as world financial powers, they'd better quit using the same tailor as variety show chimps.

Southern California is a nice place, if you could cut out the show-business cancer. It just keeps spreading.

If Disney still wants to make Epcot Center futuristic, they could do so by blowing the place up with an atom bomb.

You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.

I'm a member of the working press; you'd think I'd know better than to listen to journalists.

There's nothing more oily and cynical in politics than telling the truth.