When a couple decides to divorce, they should inform both sets of parents before having a party and telling all their friends. This is not only courteous but practical. Parents may be very willing to pitch in with comments, criticism, and malicious gossip of their own to help the divorce along.

Sloths move at the speed of congressional debate but with greater deliberation and less noise.

Liberals have a quaint and touching faith that truth is on their side and an even quainter faith that journalists are on the side of truth.

Anyone who thinks he has a better idea of what's good for people than people do is a swine.

I've been a New Yorker for ten years, and the only people who are nice to us turn out to be Moonies.

Then there's politics. Just imagine politics with its dumbbell element subtracted. There would be no Republican candidates. There would be no Democratic voters. The whole system would collapse.

All lies are told with a straight face. It is truth that's said with a dismissive giggle.