If the dollar weakens, then presumably all the things that we make in the United States - Buicks, for instance - can be sold cheap all over the world, and everyone will be buying our goods, and we'll get all sorts of yen-denominated, or yuan-denominated, or euro-denominated securities, and then everybody else will be worried.

I don't think I'll ever be a real boat reporter. My Rolex isn't big enough.

I'll pick "I'm kidding" anytime over "I'm lying."

In the American political system, you're only allowed to have real ideas if it's absolutely guaranteed that you can't win an election

Once we realized that there were these 25 invariable types - the class politician, the frigid popular girl, the kid who tags along behind the jocks - once we came up with these key characters in a cloud of marijuana, the whole thing just came together. One of the things I'm really proud of is how much of a high-school yearbook it is in its look, so much so that Hunter Publishing had the art director, David Kaestle, and I come for years to their annual convention and do a little talk on how not to do a yearbook.

The Harvard Lampoon itself, which had a pretty stellar run in the '60s.

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.