Passover is my idea of a perfect holiday. Dear God, when you're handing out plagues of darkness, locusts, hail, boils, flies, lice, frogs, and cattle murrain, and turning the Nile to blood, and smiting firstborn, give me a pass, and tell me when it's over.

I arrived in the middle of a press conference - as boring a thing to sit through if you don't know the language as it is if you do.

A charity ball is like a dance except it's tax deductible.

Each child is biologically required to have a mother. Fatherhood is a well-regarded theory, but motherhood is a fact.

Smoking cigarettes seems to alarm peace activists much more than voting for Reagan does.

There isn't much room for an outsider point of view in print any more.

Anything that makes your mother cry is fun