I like to do my principal research in bars, where people are more likely to tell the truth or, at least, lie less convincingly than they do in briefings and books.

I didn't see any NRA officials killing babies in Waco.

In case we have to shoot Democrats. It happened during the Civil War, and it could happen again.

Fishing... is a sport invented by insects and you are the bait.

I am a journalist and, under the modern journalist's code of Olympian objectivity (and total purity of motive), I am absolved of responsibility. We journalists don't have to step on roaches. All we have to do is turn on the kitchen light and watch the critters scurry.

From National Lampoon, you go directly to Saturday Night Live, because it's a lot of the same people.

We also have a lot of the same influences - we both read a lot of the beatniks. And yet what we actually do is almost exactly the opposite. His [ Hunter S. Thompson] political stuff is just wonderful, but basically nothing happens.