I love how the soccer guys just fall when they get kicked and go baby crying.They try to explain to the referee like he's their mother: "Wah! Did you see what he did?" Then they get back to playing soccer again.

I voted for Arnold Schwarzenegger 'cause I figured he can go back in the future. Put that in the act.

I'm a YouTube star, let's put it that way!That sounds like a karaoke star with balls.

I'm not into those shows like "hey everybody, gather round the TV, let's watch The Simpsons!" I'm not one of those guys: "I gotta get home, man, Family Guy's on! I gotta race to my TV before I miss the episode of Family Guy!" I'm not one of those guys.

Sometimes I become the comedy jukebox. I read the emails, people give me requests.The shows are just amazing; they're packed with people and they're so much fun to do.

Chicken pot pie--those are my three favorite things.

In the nineties, it was all women being blonde and from Sweden. But now it's changed: it's all men looking like Ellen DeGeneres.