There's no destination. There's no getting anywhere. There's just the going. The key to life is to make the going really fun. Because people that are like, โIf I just get to this, then boom!โ And then they get there and there's this dawning of an afterwards. Whereas I'm just always in the going. And it's not a frantic going like, โI gotta keep going or I'm gonna go nuts!โ I can not do anything for weeks or months if I need to and just sit and read books or watch movies. I'm just as fine consuming and absorbing new art as I am trying to make it. But it's all in the going.
Patton OswaltI think the kind of person that gravitates toward New York is a person that's not so much focused on controlling exactly how they appear and how they exit. They're more fascinated with the process.
Patton OswaltAs you get older, as a comedian, and keep doing it, what you actually start to cherish on stage is not the build-up to the jokes, but how comfortable you can be in the silence and the non-laughing parts, and how long you can take the audience without a laugh to then get a huge reaction.
Patton OswaltI identify myself as a stand-up first. Even though lately there's been an explosion of acting on my schedule.
Patton OswaltWe would not be here if humanity were inherently evil. We'd have eaten ourselves alive long ago.
Patton OswaltThis sounds like a brag, but I know how to make good fried rice. I learned in college. There are two secrets - take the rice after you cook it and let it get cold in the fridge. Then cook the egg like you're making a fried egg and just before it's done, dump the rice and veg on it and swirl it around.
Patton Oswalt