The great comfort of turning forty-nine is the realization that you are now too old to die young.

No experiment is ever a complete failure. It can always be used as a bad example.

The human hand is made complete by the addition of a baseball.

Don't bite the hand that has your allowance in it.

The great comfort of turning forty-nine is the realization that you are now too old to die young.

The more innocuous the name of a weapon, the more hideous its impact. Some of the most horrific weapons of the Vietnam era were named Bambi, Infant, Daisycutter, Grasshopper, and Agent Orange. Nor is the trend new: From the past we have Mustard Gas, Angel Chasers [two can-nonballs linked with a chain for added destruction], and the Peacemaker, to name a few.)

The odds are six to five that the light in the end of the tunnel is the headlight of an oncoming train.