I check my pulse and if I can find it, I know I've got a chance
[Getting the truth in the New York Post has been as] difficult as finding a good hamburger in Albania.
People stay married because they want to, not because the doors are locked.
Sometimes nothin' can be a real cool hand.
Our marriage works because we each carry clubs of equal weight and size.
The embarrassing thing is that my salad dressing is out-grossing my films.