There are two kinds of people in this world: the ones who don't cook out of and have NEVER cooked out of THE I HATE TO COOK BOOK, and the other kind...The I HATE TO COOK people consist mainly of those who find other things more interesting and less fattening, and so they do it as seldom as possible. Today there is an Annual Culinary Olympics, with hundreds of cooks from many countries ardently competing. But we who hate to cook have had our own Olympics for years, seeing who can get out of the kitchen the fastest and stay out the longest.

a celebrity is someone who no longer does the things that made him a celebrity.

Mothers always think you are working either too hard or not hard enough.

There are worse things than being fat, and one of them is worrying about it all the time.

But let me say this about learning experiences: they're weird. Or put it this way: what you learn from a learning experience is generally something else.

Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut save you thirty cents?

You're not supposed to cuss when you're an old lady, and just when there's so much more to cuss about.